SIMON - Well, I agree your humor got you here ...

RANDY - No, it wasn't just humor.

PAULA - No.

SIMON - I'll admit, I'm a bit torn here. I'll be honest with you because I've gotten to know you, I like you very much, and I think you're a fantastic personality. Having said that I kind of felt I was at some weird student gig, because ...

(Audience boos and catcalls)

RANDY - What's a student gig?

SIMON - You know, it's a lot of students and someone gets up and sings a song, and you know ... EH ... I really am struggling tonight.

RYAN - Why do they sing?

SIMON - What?

RANDY - The sudents.

SIMON - (To Ryan) Who's asking you?

RYAN - I'm asking YOU.

SIMON - No no no. You do the links, sweetheart, I'll do the judging.

RANDY - Ryan Seacrest every body - Ryan Seacrest.

RYAN - Don't call me sweetheart. We don't have that kind of relationship. I don't want that kind of relationship.

SIMON - I don't want that kind of relationship.

RYAN - Exactly. We'll just work together. That's fine with me, is that OK with you?

SIMON - Fine, even working's a struggle.

RYAN - Chris, sorry about this right now. It's about Chris Sligh, not you, Chris Sligh.

SIMON - Exactly. That's the point I'm trying to make.

CHRIS - My only question is, is that you know , obviously audiences think that this type of music is very popular right now. And what I have to say is that just because I don't sing Il Divo, or Teletubbies doesn't mean that ...(RANDY - OOHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Chris yeah!) I can't sing.

SIMON - Chris, you could always do the latter.

PAULA - Simon, you're terrible. Chris you're funny.

CHRIS - Alright, and I love you, you know that.

SIMON - Chris I like, you, I just don't think it was an incredible vocal performance. That's the point I was trying to make.

CHRIS - Yes sir.

SIMON - It was OK.

RYAN - I think you've hurt his feelings.

SIMON - No you haven't.

CHRIS - I'm Sorry.

PAULA - I think so.

SIMON - You've made this very uncomfortable Ryan now.

RYAN - Because for once instead you of you insulting someone else, you got insulted.

SIMON - You just made it uncomfortable.

RANDY - I think you two need to talk after class.